Just Wondering....

Ok,so today I'm putzing around the net and having my breakfast when I saw this on one of our local news sites.Evidently there is a nudist colony not far from my house....now while that might seem like a pretty cool thing and you would think old Scout would be intrigued to at least stop bye and check the scenery out at this place (The White Tail Resort...nice)...uhm yeah,uhm no...

The pic above is from the record breaking skinny dip that the resort held the other day (must've been a slow news day). Oh and before I go any further...my wife might want to check and find out what my Father in Law was doing a few days back...check the dude out on the bottom right...I swear it looks just like him!!!HA!!

Anyhow,why is it all nudist colonies contain nothing but old couples and ugly people?? Dont believe me look at the pic above and the pics below...




















Seriously,I just dont get it...now I'm not asking for some model hot people,but for crying out loud,who wants to walk around and see some dude that looks like a prune,just all hanging out "Hey look at my 75 year old pecker!!"...instead of some chick looking like Ali Larter theres someone that looks like Kirstie Alley,or instead of someone looking like Daisy Fuentes (who still has it going on),theres someone who looks like Miss Daisy!! WTF??? Guess its just one of lifes mysteries,like the pyramids,crop circles,Tyler Perry's success....Now,scuse me while I email my Father in law...he's got some explaining to do!!

Thats What You Get!!

Ahhh,man I love this pic from Weird Science!! Anways the reason its posted is some lil jackass teenie bopper in NY was too busy texting while she was walking down the street that she didnt notice the big fucking open manhole in the street and fell into it!! WTF?? Look your a frickin 15 year old lil girl,and although this may be hard to believe...but your life isnt all that important,that you cant watch where the hell your going.

I mean,yeah the city workers that had turned around to get the cones to put around the hole,probably should have put the cones around,before they took the cover off...so as to prevent some self absorbed pretentious lil dipshit from being dumb enough to fall into the hole...but still for crying out loud,this is just retarded!! And what really makes it retarded is that even though the girl had nothing wrong at all with her afterwards,her money grubbing piece of crap parents are suing the city because of the "gross" factor. Give me a break.Lil girl thats what you get...too bad you got a lil bit of poo on your shoes...pay the fuck attention jack ass!!

Thanks for the Report Capt. Frickin Obvious!!!

So,I'm reading the paper today,and saw that some "research guys" have declared that they have come to the brilliant deduction that playing "active" video games i.e. games on the Wii that make you move,is healthier for you than sitting on your ass giving your thumbs a work out on the other systems.
WTF?? Really,come on,someone paid these fucktards money to do this "research"??Whats next ?? Are we going to get a report from some research group reporting that running with the bulls in Spain is dangerous (gee ya think?),or that eating Mcdonalds everyday is bad for you,or that swimming in shark infested waters is a bad idea,or maybe that having sex with Paris Hilton is a risk to your health (her ass ought to have a Surgeon Generals warning on it)... This is just silly ass shit!!

Dammit!!!

The Dallas Cowboys...ugh,being a football fan there is nothing in this world that I despise more than the Cowboys and their mostly hideous fans (thats saying something,if you've read my rants on Twilight and sorry ass Nickleback).

I wont go on a rant about the Cowboys or their ass backward fans...no I'm hear to declare my heartbreak over hearing about Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson breaking up.Its awful.

Heres the deal,and this is a known scientific fact. Three years ago Tony Romo was a nobody back up that looked like he was a pizza delivery driver more than a quarterback.Well things happened and he ended up taking over for Drew F*#@k Tom Brady" Bledsoe and actually was doing pretty awesome (unfortunately) with the Cowboys for about a year.

Then he met Jinxica...I mean Jessica,and his play took a noticeable slide. He still put up good numbers (if your a fantasy football dude or dudette...dont want to discriminate here) ,but he and the team just seemed mired in a funk.The curse really popped up its head when Dallas two years ago had played so well the whole season and had secured homefield for the NFC playoffs. I and the rest of the football world was dreading the thought of a Dallas appearance in the Super Bowl...not because of the thought of them winning the damn thing (the Pats would have killed them),but the thought of having to hear for the two weeks leading up to the Super Bowl the bravado of the jack ass fans "How bout dem Cowboys!"..blah...it would have been hell on Earth.

Anyways I believe they had only been dating for a month or two,and well,after the regular season the Cowboys,being that they had won homefield,had the week off.Instead of prepping for the biggest game of his young career,the dude decides to head down to Mexico for some vacation and to stoop Jessica some (nothing wrong with the stooping,but dont do it in Mexico the week before the game)....anyways,the Cowboys lost the game,Romo sucked,and they havent been the same since.

And its been AWESOME!!

Well,somebody from the Cowboys organization,must have finally crunched some numbers and slapped ol' Romo in the head,because he evidently dumped the poor girl Friday,the night before her birthday...SHIT!! If he starts playing better it and the team starts winning the world will be a lot shittier of a place!!

I was hoping that those two would get married and Tony would eventually suck ass long enough to drag the Cowboys to total mediocrity and lose the job as qb of the team and end up opening Romo's Italian Eatery,while Jessica starred on bad reality shows,and they live happily ever after,and the rest of the Non Cowboy NFL fans could sleep well knowing we'd never have to hear another assinine statement from their dumbass fans... (I actually hate the fans more than the team)...shit somebody get these two on Dr. Phil...or that show with Dr. Drew...seriously they need to be back together!! KEEP THE CURSE ALIVE!!!

Hotness of the Week

Lawd have mercy!!! This is what I'm talking about right here!! This lil thing of hotness is what I call Mary Elizabeth Winstead. She has been in a ton of stuff,especially between 2005 and 2007...she was in the remake of Black Christmas (as stated before the hotness quotient in that flick was totally amazing),she was in Final Destination 3 (Haven't seen that one,loved the first one,the second opened with a bang literally,with a kick ass car accident,but sucked donkey balls after that),she was also in Grindhouse in the Tarantino part of the film Deathproof as a lil cutie actress that gets left as collateral with an inbred while her friends test out a badass ride.

And most recently,Timothy Olyphant tried to kill her because she was Bruce Motherfuckin Willis's daughter in the last Die Hard.

She is absolutely adorable...she's like a lil fuzzy bunny that you just want to pick up and cuddle in your arms for a few hours!!!

Her next role is going to be starring as the object of Micheal "I'm playing the same dude from Superbad in every movie since" Ceras in something called Scott Pilgrim v. The World.It could be pretty funny,its directed by Edgar Wright who did one of my Top 10 flicks Shaun of the Dead!!

Enjoy this lil southern belle (she's from North Carolina) in all her astounding hotness!!

Not So Thrilling

Ok,so this will be my last thing about Michael Jackson....but I just saw that Cali "bail our asses out please Obama"fornia just spent 1.4 million the other day on that memorial service. Look if the state is sacrificing jobs in the school systems because they dont have money,maybe,just maybe they shouldnt be spending 1.4 million on a guy a few weeks earlier,they were thinking of him as"Michael Freakass Jackson". I've got no problem with the memorial if they can afford it,but I think that somebody needs to get their priorities straight in Cali...

Stupid Scouts Top 10 Films of His Time (because thats what matters...hehehe)

Well,still have a few more hours at work to kill (hate working late nights),and I dont have a damn thing to do...so I figured you know what,every asshole with a blog of some type has all types of opinionated "top this top that" for all kinds of stupid shit,and not just films...but anything really...so I figured what the hell.I'll do my top films (i.e. favorite films of all time). Now this doesnt mean they have to be Oscar worthy or award worthy.No...these are the types of movies,that you can watch over and over again without ever being tired of them.So if you dont agree with my choice,then bugger off,I dont care,these are just my opinion,and everyones got one,so what the hey,cut me some slack....

so here we go....

10...

The Ring and Boogie Nights- Ok so I hate starting off with a tie,but I went over and over with these two and they both fit into my category of just loving them too much and I cant get enough of either flick,so I couldnt get myself to drop one out.

The Ring is phenomenal and to be honest is my favorite horror flick of the past decade so far.It is a remake and actually was probably the reason that this whole dreaded remake bs started in the horror genre this decade...sigh.But this is an awesome flick.I have seen the Japanese remake,and though thats the original,and it is creepy and well done.I think the U.S. remake is actually superior. The impending doom feeling that just envelopes this movie is just awesome.It does what a horror movie is supposed to do...and thats creep you the fuck out!!

Boogie Nights- This is the flick that really got things going for Mark Wahlberg and also Don Cheadle (who is actually awesome in this...I could watch the dude make a sandwich...just an awesome actor),it also has John C. Reilly (half of Shake and Bake...hehe) throwing in some well timed comedic parts (and this is waaaay before anyone thought of him as being good for comedic roles),and its got Heather Graham in her BEST role ever as Roller Girl...if her nude scene doesnt get ya going,you need to see a doctor!! Phenomenal!!! Oh and it has Burt Reynolds in his last really good role.Between the great acting,the awesome 70's-80's soundtrack,and the memorable scenes,I can watch this all the time,except for the very ending (which I still have only watched just the first time,the other 20 I end it before that) if you've seen the flick you probably understand!! But just a cool ass flick!!

9.

Shaun of the Dead- I wish this movie had came out while I was in college!! This is the type of flick you sit with your buds either after before going out on a weekend and getting drunk and what not or after the partying when you all want to watch some funny ass shit!! This movie is frickin great!! They have the perfect blend of comedy and zombie stuff to keep anyone satisfied.This is the type of flick that you'll notice something new everytime.

8.

28 Days Later- Man I LOVE this and its sequel...hell you could almost combine the two and just have it be one fricking movie.If you are one of the few who doesnt know much about this flick,its directed by Danny Boyle who just won an Oscar for Slumdog Millionaire.This is the flick that introduced running zombies,which to me a fricking waaay scarier than lumbering zombies...a lot more intense,its because of this flick that sooo many zombie movies have been coming out,heck if it wasnt for this flick there wouldnt probably be the awesome Dawn of the Dead remake.Very cool ass pic!!!

7.

Scarface-Man back in college we used to watch this bitch every weekend almost,Pacino is soooo badasss in this flick.This movie has soooo many memorable scenes and quotes...Its so memorable that quotes from the movie are still used a ton nowadays...and not just by rappers!!If you dont like this flick,you dont have balls!!!

6.

Old School- I just watched this for the umpteenth time,this is my FAVORITE Will Ferrell role ever (And I love most of the dudes roles,but Frank the Tank is awesome!!!). Everyone in this flick is on the A game.Its ridiculously funny. Its by the guy who also did The Hangover (which might eventually pop in my Top 10 after some time).Awesome fun!! Your my boy Blue!!

5.

Seven- "Whats in the box??!!" nuff said.....

4.

Swingers- Man,this flick,just thinking of certain scenes make me chuckle.If your a guy,theres a lot that you can relate to in this flick.This is the movie that really got the ball rolling for Vince Vaughn and Jon Favreau. They'd been in other stuff before hand,but this is what made them "the big winners".This movies soo money and it doesnt even know it!!

3.

Dazed and Confused- Alright,Alright,Alright....S.O.S to Richard Linklater (the director of this epic),please go get Matthew McConaughey and rescue him from chick flick hell!! Seriously he is frickin hilarious in this film as the older loser hanging out with the high school kids.The older he gets,they stay the same age...yes they do...(HA).Anywasy Mr. McConaughey please find your mojo...please!! I know your making tons of cash playing stupid in flicks with Kate Hudson and stuff,but dude,you are awesome in this flick...you were Wooderson!! Please find yourself an ensemble adult comedy,either done by Mr. Linklater,Judd Apatow,or Todd Phillips and just bring back the funny!!

This movie was made in 93',but it captures the era its set in so well (1976) that it almost feels like its from that time.With a kick ass soundtrack and a bunch of actors that are recognizable,including Benny Affleck....this was MY College movie!!

2.

Alien-

I know lots of people believe that Aliens is superior to this...but I say no way,thats more of a popcorn flick,this is more of a creepy,almost haunted house type flick,this The Ring and my #1 flick all have that forboding shits not going to end well feeling to them.I love the Alien creature itself.I think its the baddest ass creature ever!! I enjoy basically all the Alien movie (the first 3 the most),and even enjoy AVP for what it is,but man I HATE AVPR..man fuck that movie!! That flick was sooooo frickin dark,you could barely see the Aliens...hello the creatures are black in color,you cant have them in rainy pitch black shots the whole movie!! That movie made me understand how Stevie Wonder would feel like being at a movie!! I ADORE this film!!!!

1.

Ta da!! - The Shining- Yeah I've heard people who claim not to like this because its doesnt really follow the book...but you know what?? I dont give a shit,its not like I'm going to read some thousand page book anyways...look this is the creepiest frickin movie I have ever watched,and it doesnt get old...this bitch is almost 30 years old and I never get tired of it after probably watching a billion times.This movie is sooo well textured and shot beautifully,and the acting is sick...this is Nicholson at his bat shit craziest!! And those frickin twins...jeez!! I want a copy of this movie buried with me when I die!!! AWESOME from the opening shot!!!

PS- I would like to throw a bone out to two other favs of mine that I just didnt have room for- Jaws and Halloween...they'll turn up if I ever do a top 10 horror list...

What say you??